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Wednesday, 15 February 2017 15:56

“Dude, the Magic Rock is back”

On balance, I quite like traditions – after all, I do still use a cheque book (well, technically three chequebooks), buy DVDs and vote for the National Party. My default philosophy is - if something is working then I won’t change anything because I just want it to keep functioning as it always had before.

Wednesday, 08 February 2017 17:47

“Dude, this is going to be Epic”

I began last week’s blog with some considerable gloating about favourable rugby results and, as I should have expected, fate immediately slapped me firmly on my ample derriere. I was of course completely wrong. I falsely accused the All Blacks of coming fifth at the Wellington Sevens when in fact they actually finished sixth.

Now, everyone knows that I am not one to gloat when I am right – partly because it happens so rarely – but I was about the Wellington Sevens last weekend. In recent McMalty blogs I had repeatedly touted the power of the current Scottish Sevens rugby squad, and pointed out their august place above New Zealand in the rankings – partly because that situation is even rarer than me being right.

Next Wednesday (25 January 2017) is Robbie Burns Day, a hugely important day on the Scottish calendar as right-thinking Celtic people around the world celebrate the epic poetry of Mr Robert Burns with whisky, haggis, poems and beer. [1] Malthouse will be marking this august date appropriately with a massive Scottish craft beer tap showcase, some Lorne sausage, deep fried Mars bars and haggis. [2]

The Year in Beer: 2016 – Reviewed Through the Bottom of a Pint Glass

2016 has been a decidedly mixed year. If I was a trained historian – and it seems that I am and have a legitimate piece of paper to prove it – I would academically describe this year as “WTF.”

Epic 11th Birthday: “My secret dream is to write an epic poem. That's probably the most pretentious thing I've said.”

 

This blog has for many years been built on three literary devices – tangents, disclaimers and footnotes. For once, it is time to move straight to the disclaimer before one and a half pages of finely written tangential prose about cricket (not so good right now), Star Wars (looking kind of marvellous right now) and soon to be former Prime Minister John Key. [1]